Pulling Chalks....

As many of you know tomorrow marks the 1 year mark for Joey. I ask that you all pray for Rob and I as we try to deal with tomorrow. I will not be home to blog about anything this weekend because Rob and I are going to be getting away alone for the weekend. I will however share more with you all on Monday of how today (21)- the 23 went for us. I just ask for lot's of prayer this weekend. Also I have since today (21st) had the skin removed from my hand with my burn. The blister finally gave way and it is nothing but raw flesh right now (banged up of course). So if you could all pray for little pain as this starts to regain some new skin that would be GREAT!!! Thank you all for being there for me with all of this. I love you and miss you all!!!

Giving my Child a Fighting chance.

Alright I might be a couple days off on this but around this time last year I found out through ultrasound that I had regained some water around Joey, not alot but some!! We where SOOOO EXCITED that there was finally something around him!! Well later that early afternoon I was given some med's to help me with some stuff and not even a half hour later I was throwing up due to those med's. Well needless to say when I threw up it also forced any of the water that I had regained out. I WAS NOT HAPPY. I felt like it was all my fault. If I had chosen NOT to take this medications then the water would still be around Joey and not all over me in the bed. I was given medications to be able to have a BM because I had not had one in over a week so they where trying to get me to be able to go because my stomach was REALLY starting to cramp. So that was how I started my day off about year ago today. Later on in the afternoon was next too one of the hardest days of my life. I had to lay in bed and talk to a Doc who told me that when and if I do deliver my baby before the 23-24 week mark they where going to do NOTHING for him because he was not "viable". I was SICK to my stomach and pissed off at the same time. Some of the things that where talked about that I can REALLY remember where this. I had the doc tell me that if and when Joey comes and it is before the 23-24 mark they where NOT going to do ANYTHING to try and save him. I said I cant take that I cant let you do that. I asked him so if I do deliver him and he comes out breathing you are going to just let him suffocate to death?? I thought that you guys where here to SAVE lives?? I gave him this to think about. I asked him if he has any kids himself, and he said well yes I do. I asked him ok well if your kid got hit by an 18 wheeler and they brought him to the ER and the doc took one look at him and said ummmm... well I dont THINK he is going to make it so I am not going to do any work on him to at least TRY and save him. Would you fight for your kids life. Would you tell him to get to work and try to save your kids life?? He said yes but this is different. I said NO it is not different they are both living breathing human beings, mine is just inside of me. You could tell that he was NOT happy with me after I gave him that little seniero to think about. They where going to make me sign a consent form giving them permission to even attempt to work on Joey cause they DONT work on babies below the 23-24 wk mark. HOW SAD IS THAT. I told him that I cant see who he is to tell me that my son should our shouldn't have a fighting chance if he came out alive (breathing then having to suffocate). I told him that I would not be able to live with myself as a person or as a mother if I didnt put up EVERY fighting chance for my son. At the end of EVERY day I need and wanted to feel like I did EVERYTHING I could do for Joey. At the end of the talk the doc told me that he had NEVER seen someone fight for their child so much in a situation like mine. So that made me feel a little bit better yet upset more cause I thought that it was even sad that I had to put that fight up.

Word of advice

Check your oven BEFORE you start it. You think that everyone would maybe think to do that before they turn there oven on right?? NOPE not me, and now I am paying for it. Today I got to go to the ER to find out that I have 2nd almost 3rd degree burns on my right hand:P Long story short, Robbie put a dish towel in my oven, Well not knowing this I turned the oven on to heat up to make dinner and I started to smell smoke. So I opened the oven door to find out I had a burning towel in my oven. I grabbed tongs to grab it out, instead of putting the towel into the sink I tried to go out the back door with it cause it was engulfed in flames. Well when I found out that the back door was locked I tried to make it out to the front door, In the process I am still holding onto the burning towel with tongs and it is now burring my had. So needless to say I dropped the towel on the floor (Burning the floor now) and put the fire out with a bowel of water. So now I have burned my hand AND the floor. I don't know how this is going to work out considering we are renting the house we are in and the kitchen floor is now going to have to be replaced. So lesson learned today ALWAYS CHECK THE OVEN BEFORE TURNING IT ON!!! So tomorrow I get to call a burn specialest!!! P.S. Yes this REALLY is MY hand in the pic.

To my Mom and Hollie

Around this time last year is when my Mom and Hollie both came down to FL to help Rob and I with A LOT of stuff. Not only where they here for support but they came down and unpacked my WHOLE HOUSE of stuff. Let me tell you it was NOT an easy thing to do. When we unpacked the truck the night before my water broke it was POOOOOORRRRING rain out and we had quite a walk from our front door to where we parked our cars. So when the guys would bring in a box they just kinda put it where it would fit and went out for the next one. So needless to say by the time they where all done there was only a walk way from the kitchen door to the stair way, and this was a 2200 sq ft house (with up stairs). I don't know what I would have done if my Mom and Sister had not come down to help with the house. They also help A LOT with Robbie. Until my Mom and Hollie got down here Robbie was staying with the lady Lisa over night and everything (and she has 3 kids that had just started back to school). Once my Mom and Hollie got down here they where taking care of Robbie round the clock.!!!! I loved knowing that Robbie was with someone that he knew. Don't get me wrong he went to Lisa with no problem, But just knowing that he was with them made me feel better!! Hollie and my Mom would bring Robbie in EVERYDAY to the hospital for me so I could see him.!!! I LOVED IT when Robbie would come rolling through those doors!!! It MADE my dad!! Not that everyone else didn't it's just something about Robbie at that time was helping me make it trough it. I think it was his innocents to the whole thing that was going on and he was happy no matter what and that helped me. As far as what was going on with Joey at this point nothing to much was going on in the hospital other then just laying there and having company. I don't know what I would have done without the help and love from Hollie and my Mom. All I can say and keep saying is THANK YOU SO MUCH FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART!!!!!! I love you two VERY MUCH. Thank you for making my house a home when I got out of the hospital, and Thank you for taking care of my baby when I couldn't. You two mean EVERYTHING to me!!! ALL my love ~Brittany~

P.S. The pics at top are what they turned my home into!!! AWSOME JOB!! All of what you see was packed with boxes anywhere from there wast to there head high!! AND they did it with watching Robbie.

One year ago is when it ALL started.

Today marks the one year of everything that has happened with Joey. At this time last year Rob and I had JUST moved down here to FL. We had just gotten here on the 10 of September. When we had gotten down here we had to go straight to the ER due to the fact that I had started bleeding VERY badly. We went to the ER only to find out that the guys was going to do a ANOTHER pap on me (my 2nd one in 3 weeks). When he came back into the room he had told me that I had an infection and that is why I was bleeding. He put me on some meds and sent me "home" A.K.A the hotel because we didn't have a home at this point we where living at the Navy Lodge on base. So I went "home" did what I had to do with the meds and went to bed. The next day was crunch time to find a place because at this point we had a budget truck that HAD to be back by the next day (we are now on Sept 11 (2006)). So while Rob went to unload the budget truck with ALL of our stuff I went out house hunting. A girl I had meat previous to us moving down here at Rob's OCS graduation had help me by getting on line and looking up different house in our price range for us (take into mind we where renting). I called her up and she gave me the name and number to 4 or 5 different renters. AWESOME the first one I called was able to get me in to look at it THAT day!! Cool so I went to look at it. She knew our situation with HAVING to get into a place ASAP. So she gave keys on spot and said we would work everything out later!!! AWSOME so now I have a place to live, Rob and another guy came and unloaded the BIG stuff into the house that night. The stuff that we would not be able to take back to the house without the budget truck. So we finished to the unloading of the truck and went back to the Navy Lodge for yet another night. The next day I was Cramping from the min I woke up. We went and got some food, did a little bit of running around and it kept getting wrose. At this point we where at the budget rental place returning the truck. I told Rob that when we leave here we have to take another trip the the ER cause I am cramping REALLY bad and want to get this looked at. Yeah he said no prob. We where at the budget rental place for a while because we where getting a credit on our truck because of some MAJOR issues we had with it on the way down here (braking down on the side of the road for 6 hours is what it was to be exact). Well while waiting I had to go the the bathroom so I went to the bathroom and had noticed that I was starting to bleed a little bit more so knowing that I was going to the ER I went back out to the car to get another pad. Well when I opened the door to the van I felt like I was peeing my pants and just couldn't stop. I RIGHT away knew what was happening. I waddled as fast as I could to go tell Rob what was happening. I got inside and told Rob WE NEED TO LEAVE NOW. MY WATER JUST BROKE. Thankfully we where right around the corner from the Navel Hospital. Got into the ER they got me back to a room and used the little test strips to tell if my water really had broken and indeed it had. I just started to loss it. I don't remember a whole lot after all that happened. I do remember a lady telling me "Well be thankful that you have one beautiful baby." I looked at her and said "NO I have two beautiful babies now get me up to the baby floor where they know what they are doing",I remember them talking about wanting to do ANOTHER PAP but didn't have the tools nor the ability to do so. And I also remember Rob and Lisa (the lady that had helped find a place to live) going in and out of the room cause they where PISSED at the fact that it was taking them so long to get me up to the labor and delivery floor. Those are the few things that I remember. about what happened after I got to the ER. I then got moved up to the labor and delivery floor about an hour or so after getting to the hospital. When getting up there I met LT. Taylor. this lady helped me through a lot of this. She was the mid wife type of lady for that floor. She is the first one that took me into a room to do the pelvic exam. After all that I got moved to a room where I was told that I would be on COMPLETE bed rest (laying down) so that we could try and regain some water around Joey. That was pretty much my fist day in the hospital with Joey. I am going to cont. to post some of what my days where like for the next few weeks. I have never typed out my story with Joey before and I think by doing this it will help me remember all of what really did go on and help me look at the good that did come out of all of this.

Hey everyone just putting out there that TODAY is Kylee's 7th Birthday!! I just want to wish you a VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY KYLEE!! I love you my brown eyed girl and I miss you VERY much:( Have a GREAT day today!!!

Miles in September ~8.7~